I am feeling in a reflective mood tonight, so your going to get another blog from me. As I sit here in my tiny yet cute hotel room alone, I was thinking how great it is to share my days and travel with you, I have to say that I would not be in this hotel if I did not post that blog last week. I still can’t believe it myself. Well January went better than what I was expecting it to. If you scroll to the 1st January you will see what I was worried about, but now I don’t have to move house I still have a job, I have kept up with my daily blogs, and the best thing is I am feeling more myself. The biggest though is my blog from last week Day 25 to be specific. It was my day of the revelation of my independence, I was wanting to go away but that nagging person in my head was stopping me from being free. Look at me now, I fought my fear and I am in Rome I did it. It was a spontaneous break and I ran for it, it makes me feel amazing, it is a huge achievement I have never done anything like this in my life, I never thought I would have the guts to. Even though I am alone, I feel better knowing I still have all you out there in my Blogsphere to share everything I do.
So this is just a big thank you, for the likes, the adds and the smiles.
I do not know what it was that happened this morning, something kicked in to my system that I am a grown up, that I can be and I am now fully independent. I do not have to tie my life to time. It feels like a revelation of the life ahead of me. That I am free. I live in a flat paying my own bills, I have an on-going (well as much as my contract keeps stretching) Job, I have to take holidays where if I choose I can go away.
The latter I have been thinking most of. I am very much a person who keeps a distance and watches, feels nervous at new things but knows that if I conquer it I feel amazing. And this year I feel like I need to conquer that feeling inside me otherwise my Independence is not going to go far. So I have been thinking about going to Rome next Saturday… of course someone in my head is saying no I cant go on my own but another is telling me Go, be free. I know I can just book it now but something is stopping me like always. It is like I need that permission, which we all seek in childhood. I know I don’t need it, but it feels like my safety net.
To go to Rome or not ?. That is the question.
What do you think, Do you have that feeling that keeps you back from doing the things in life which you wish you could, or are you person like my best friend (who is currently on an adventure) and takes any opportunity in hand and lives life to the full. All I can say, Watch this space, this time next Saturday I might have been brave enough and I will be in Rome, or my fear will stop me and I will be sat here on my laptop. We shall see. Rome was not built in a day, I don’t think my fear will vanish that quick either.
Enjoy your weekend. Blogsphere